No 378: the Dilemma

Thursday, January 28, 2010

In every wedding-themed movie or reality TV show, there is a tormented scene in which a daft groom heads to a strip club, only to be admonished by his bride-to-be. While strip clubs have long been a dangerous minefield in relationships, I wanted to share my own view on this particular wedding etiquette dilemma.

Mr. Wonderful’s first foray into a strip club followed a long evening of drinking; after he poured me into bed, he and his best friend collected a small pile of singles and disappointed themselves at the locked doors of the Hustler Club. But never fear, he eventually made it into one.
And how glad I am.

There is no better way to send your sweetheart back into your loving arms than letting him run wild in a nudie bar. The women smell like sparkles, Britney Spear’s perfume and liquor, the abundance of breast jobs and lip fillers is frightening and Mr. Wonderful recalled his horror when the first “exotic dancer” removed her G-string.

We don’t look like porn stars, and believe me, the appeal of that cannot be overestimated. If your beloved and his buddies are set on a strip club to celebrate his final days of singledom, there’s no reason to object (although I suggest a couple of strong cocktails to steel yourself). A strip club will not change the way he feels about you; if anything, it will make him more worshipful of the gorgeous, loving woman at home. Your groom will spend the evening in the company of his buds, even if Destiny and Bambi are the entertainment.

Photo from weheartit.

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